Breaking News

Team Comet has announced that it has parted company with high performance coach Flash Gordon. Comet’s executive management did not feel that Comet was delivering against several Key Performance Indicators and all members of the leadership group were asked to submit a PowerPoint pack on how things could be improved. It is understood that Flash muttered something along the lines of “engineers don’t do PowerPoint” and refused to cooperate.

There have been rumours for some time that all was not happy within Team Comet. Several experienced observers have pointed out that a thrashing up the back door once a week was never going to be sufficient to turn Comet into the elite athlete promised when Team Comet was launched last year. There have also been whispers that Flash has been reported to the ER Chief Steward on more than one occasion for illegal use of the whip. We asked the Chief Steward for a comment but, perhaps learning his lesson from the recent Wheel Sucking debacle, the Chief Steward said that all investigations were now strictly confidential.

B1/M has been asked to stand in as high performance coach while Team Comet interviews candidates for the permanent position. Potential candidates are invited to present their credentials in writing to Team Comet c/o the Bitter & Twisted Café, Kent Street, Sydney. Meanwhile expect to see Comet riding around on a steel bike with a house brick strapped to the handlebars.


In other news the B2B bunch have reportedly made a lucrative offer for Danny the Boy to return to their fold. They are hoping that his epic ride reports may add a bit of interest to their otherwise pedestrian email list and that they may encourage their 3 days a week riders to get out a bit more.

A spokesperson for the ER executive has denied talk of a transfer deal and said that Danny the Boy is not for sale at any price.

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